Where does my heart go when romance consumes my mind? I have absolutely no idea sometimes, to be perfectly honest. I just want to be numb of the feelings so I might find my smile. Yet no matter how hard I try, it gets me nowhere because every time she comes into view, my pain lightens a little, in hopes that my great love will find its reanimation. Mother thinks I’m girl crazy, but me… she makes me want to live again.
In my fantasies, or non-memories of forevermore, this battle is the one worth living and dying for, for aeons and millennia. She haunts my soul with a summer breeze that is her sweet breath I’ve fallen in adore with. I wither to dust when she looks into my eyes, only to come together with a renewed hope for life. I get so lost in her heart that I forget to remember the colour defining her tender gaze.
Then I realize where my body remains, unable to reach out and hold her hand. Her affections are so near and so far away. I hate how I can’t offer up one of my kidneys, but true love cannot be purchased, and it cuts too deep when I’m reminded that the only way to love her for eternity is to wish upon her smiles and laughter and the way she dreams. I can’t help but melt in my own tears that were never destined to be touched away.
Why do I always see into the heart of this delightful creature? Why does her spirit’s radiance make even sunshine glow? Why do I continue seeking after the impossible? Perhaps when I look to the reflection of my decrepit abode, I want nothing more than to believe that someday, the eloquent words describing her beauty since the beginning of time, may surround my broken shell and make me whole again.
Undo me, please, someone? Take me away from this death and love me for a minute, then break my heart in two, so I might know the art of romance. I can’t live like this anymore. My cure lingers in her kiss, my first and last step in a walk I need to claim as my own.